Monday, 18 March 2013

The Present

Sometimes it takes a little step back to get a closer look--look away, look back, refocus. I've been lamenting the late spring we are having, the -20C temperatures and the snow that just. won't. stop. Today we got out for a drive to Grams house and, with two boys quiet in the car, I had a chance to think, recharge, let go.

Here we are, blessed beyond belief to be healthy, fortunate enough to afford a new home closer to my family, and I've been b!tching about the weather. To anyone who will listen.

Cringe.

While what I should be doing is savouring this time of my life. I have a delightful 3 year old that entertains and surprises me everyday with how bright, how innocent, how very good he is at heart. Our one year old is saying his first words, so proud of himself, chubby and glowing and about to take his first steps. Why would I want to rush this? Why would I rather pace from window to window searching for a sign of spring? It will get here when it gets here. I've got an abundance of life, joy, spring, right here in my arms. I just needed to look away for a moment so that I could see it again.

So when the forecast tells me that we have another week at least of daytime highs being below zero, I choose not to feel claustrophobic in my own home because we've spent so much time here in the last months. This is the home where I spent two pregnancies, brought two healthy boys home from the hospital, gardened and played, slept and dreamed. I don't want to rush this. These moments will be gone all too soon. As much as I look forward to our new home, the fresh start, the new yard and all our plans, I can't let go of this place any faster than I have to. It's been a happy home and it will remain so for another 7 weeks. We are going to enjoy every minute of it.

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